Codependency in relationships has the power to spread like wildfire. One moment you are two normal people in a loving caring relationship – the next, it is total mayhem.
It is easy for others outside the relationship to see that what you have is unhealthy but you may end up missing the signs completely.
Are you feeling disrespected and trapped in your relationship? You’re not alone… Check out the 6 warning signs of a codependent relationship.
1. You Have Lost Your Sense of Independence
You had friends and a great job, you used to go out often and had a normal social life.
When you find that you are afraid to do things or you can’t go places without telling/asking your partner to avoid making them mad, it’s a tell-tale sign that you may be in a codependent relationship.
It could be that you are not allowing yourself to be independent or someone isn’t allowing you to have independence.
Either way, independence is important for each spouse in a healthy relationship.
2. You Want to Change Your Partner
Is your partner hot-tempered? Are they violent, verbally abusive or dismissive?
When you love a person it is normal to want to help them become better. But not at your own expense.
When you suffer serious trauma, mental or physical, all in the name of trying to fix or change your partner, then you are certainly in a codependent relationship.
3. You Completely Lose Touch with People You Love
You used to connect with your family members and friends either on the phone or face to face on a regular basis. But now that you are in a relationship, you can barely remember the last time you saw them or talked to them.
When you become secluded and make your partner your main point of focus by ignoring everyone else, you become codependent. You are likely to suddenly turn to alcohol and drugs either to feel good or to numb the loneliness.
In fact, codependency and addiction often go hand in hand.
4. You Always Need to Ask for Permission to Do Something
It could be as simple as dressing a certain way or even holding your hair up instead of down.
It is perfectly fine to want to inform your spouse that you will be doing something on your own as a way to notify them. But if you find yourself waiting for a yes or a no in order to go out and do it, that is a problem.
The need to ask for permission from your spouse to do the most basic things is one of the early signs of codependency.
In the long run, you end up losing your self-confidence which opens the door to you becoming a victim of abuse in the relationship.
5. Always Needing Reassurance Is One of the Signs of a Codependent Relationship
If you are always worried that you’ll get your heart broken, always need to hear that you are loved, or you flirt with others just to see how mad your partner will get, these are some of the signs that you are in a codependent relationship.
These bad habits only work to deprive the other partner of the peace of mind and enjoyment that should come with being in a healthy relationship.
6. You Do All the Work to Maintain the Relationship
Are you the one always making phone calls to check up on your partner? Always the one initiating conversations? Always saying, “I love you” or pretty much the one responsible for maintaining the entire relationship?
If you feel drained or like you are in a relationship with yourself, then yes, you are in an unhealthy codependent relationship.
Signs of a Codependent Relationship: Have You Noticed Any Red Flags?
Has one or more of the above signs of a codependent relationship struck a chord? There’s a very thin line between what is considered acceptable and what is considered codependence in a relationship.
With the signs listed above, you are now better able to distinguish where your relationship lies and establish if you should find help.
Browse through our blog section for more information on how to keep your relationship healthy.
